Last night, after the NY Jets put some whipped cream on the Crapple Pie that was Week 5, I turned to playoff baseball just in time to catch former San Francisco Giants closer Brian Wilson take the mound as the Los Angeles Dodgers set-up guy. That's us, I thought - we're the Brian Wilson of NFL handicapping. We were closers last year, finishing games and weeks by striking out the side, nailing the Sunday afternoon and evening games, not relying on Geno Smith to bring our ATS record up to 4-10 on Monday.
Then it occurred to me that the only difference between Brian, Marco, and me is that he still has that intangible confidence of a closer. Plus the Hair Club for Men beard, the Hair Club for Punk Rockers mohawk, and a seven figure deal on the table from 800razors to be their brand ambassador. I'd like to say for the record that I only have some three-day stubble going on and a receding hairline, but I'll work for a lot less.
My next thought, after searching for similarities between me, Marco, and Brian was how funny I thought it would be if a former closer come set-up guy finished off the eighth inning, threw his hands in air and dropped to his knees or ran and jumped in his catchers arms to celebrate the victory that was not. The moral of this short obscure story - it's pretty easy to cheer yourself up after a miserable weekend of football if you just change the channel and use your imagination.
I mean, c'mon - we're sports fans and gamblers. There's always another game or week just around the corner.
WNBA Finals continue tonight. You might think I'm kidding, but the Lynx are an impressive defensive team, covered 9 easily in Game 1 and are set to do the same at home in Game 2 tonight. Maya Moore hardly ever lost at UConn and she hardly ever loses now.
In the spirit of turning to the better gender for help with our gambling compulsion, I decided to shake things up at TSZ this week by recruiting a new Expert and three year veteran of...well, the world...when I asked my daughter to help us out with our NFL Week 6 Picks. I'm not quite sure how to gauge her confidence in these picks for our Friday Five, but I think she might be on to something with her analysis. I mean let's face it - Bears do run very fast, and although they did far from that last night, Jets do sometimes make you want to throw up. Here is my three year-old daughter's take on Week 6 of the NFL. Enjoy.
Just to summarize (and document), her picks are as follows:
1. Bears (-8) over Giants
2. Chiefs (-10.5) over Raiders
3. Eagles (-1.5 over Bucs
4. Packers (-3) over Ravens
5. Lions/Browns - Pass (I somehow left this game out)
6. Panthers (+2.5) over Vikings
7. Texans (-7) over Rams
8. Bills (+7.5) over Bengals
9. Titans (+13.5) over Seahawks
10. Broncos (-28) over Jags - she did say Jags first, so we'll give her a flex game
11. Jets (+2.5) over Steelers
12. Niners (-10.5) over Cardinals
13. Saints (+2) over Patriots
14. Cowboys (-4.5) over Redskins
15. Chargers (PK) over Colts
We'll have our Thursday Night Preview and Pick up tomorrow and the rest of our picks Thursday morning. Enjoy your week everyone.
Vinny and Marco
Hey not bad picks, I like my Vikings to beat the Panthers though. Cool site.
ReplyDeleteI knew I could count on my daughter to get us some new readers. I thought the Panthers over the Vikes was also one of her weaker picks. Please know that if Minnesota had an animal for a mascot you would have had a much better chance. But once Josh Freeman gets the nod next week, she'll come around.
DeleteThanks for reading, TS.
Vinny
What a cute daughter! I laughed most of the video. That said, you are a degenerate of the highest order sir. Welcome to the club! Including your daughter is sick! Go cowboys yeeeeeeehawwwwwww
ReplyDeleteGeez. I slave away for weeks over a hot keyboard and all my daughter has to do is say Yeehaw and Jets make you throw up and the comment board is lighting.
DeleteThat's funny, Dallas. I thought the same thing. If she grows up to be a degenerate gambler, I will feel terrible. If, on the other hand, she grows up to be Linda Cohn - I will be so proud and will so enjoy the field passes and tickets on the 50 yard line.
What a game your 'Boys played last week. Really heartbreaking. I had the Broncos, but with such a shitty morning in my rear view I was pulling for them.
Thanks for checking out the video,
Vinny
I had the over only....that worked! Not heartbreaking at all when you expect it. I'm still a fan, but I'm realistic. When the cowboys had the ball towards the end, and my fellow degenerate friend was sweating it out for a Denver -7 push, I turned to him and said:"don't worry, a good team marches this down and wins the game...not the cowboys, they'll turn it over." I'm actually upset Denver didn't score the td...
DeleteVery cute, my 3 year old would have sat for 2 seconds... how do you do that? He says she made a mistake on the Bills... I told him she was three... he ran away...
ReplyDeleteCam
Hey Cam,
DeleteIt's only recently that my daughter will do things like that, plus I edited all the restlessness and "can we do a puzzle now" out and withheld cookies and love until she was done.
Vinny