Monday Morning Quarterback: It Can Get Any Worse!

Well, that's the last time I'm going to use the expression, "It can't get any worse." Euphemistic expressions are like karmic bait, dangled in front of the universe as if to say, "Show me otherwise." And the universe obliges - with a 3-10 ATS weekend. Last week I mentioned The Spread Zone feeling like the Bad News Bears or the Jacksonville Jags of NFL 'capping where readers were cheering us on with an unshakable faith that we would one day turn it around and get win. This morning, however, it feels more like emotional pornography - a phrase I use to describe reality television - where people tune in to find out what disaster is going to unfold next and how the main characters are going to navigate it.



"Will Vinny and Marco right the ship? Will they even show up for their hobby Monday Morning? Or have fellow 'cappers capped the formerly reliable 'cappers? Tune in next week for another riveting episode of The Suck Zone."

By yesterday morning I was done with football, done with The Spread Zone, done with writing, and ready to return to a quiet life of private compulsive gambling where I could just be as awful as I wanted and not explain myself to anyone. Ahhh, nothing sounded healthier than that. Instead, I put some money on the Broncos, and turned on the game.

Earlier in the week, a fellow gambler and new friend of TSZ, Anonymous Cam, came by our Picks Post and left the following comment, "I have been reading all this year, tough luck with the previous 4 weeks...it happens to all of us. This week, I could really see u not gettting 1 game right except Den.... who in the world would bet on NYG?" Well, we showed him - even though Romo turned back into Oh-No when the clock struck two (minutes), the Broncos didn't cover either. Thank you for reading, Anonymous Cam. And I know I sound facetious, but I really appreciate the comments and I hope you'll stick around long enough to see us right this ship. 

Sitting at 2-9 ATS heading into the Sunday Night game(s), another cool/surprising/insane thing happened - I received an e-mail from a new friend Epic Joe asking me for my input on some prop bets. I told him he must be a very religious man to have faith in anything I recommend. He told me to lighten up, that he'd been around TSZ long enough to know we'll be fine. My recommendations did not win him any money because they all have to hit, but 5 out of 7 felt better than anything else going on in my life. 

Okay, time to take my Pocket Full of Kryptonite and make like a Spin Doctor with the Top Three Things I Realized this weekend.

3. The Spread Zone finally found a time slot we can win in. Going forward, we shall remain a perfect 1-0 ATS in Sunday Night football games played after Sunday Night football games until the Oakland A's knock off the Detroit Tigers, the Red Sox or the Rays, and create another scheduling conflict during the World Series.

2. After going 3-10 ATS, I can proudly say with 77% certainty that the Atlanta Falcons are a lock to win and cover tonight's Monday Night Football game...because we took the Jets. 

1. I still love football even though it makes me homi/geni/suicidal at the end of the last five Sundays in a row. Although I was a mouse click away from deleting The Spread Zone, The Daily Spread, and both of my on-line gambling accounts - the San Francisco Forty Niners renewed my resolve when, in testing #2 above, I placed a wager on them knowing full well the Texans were one of our Friday Five locks. We all know how that game turned out. Looks like we've finally found value in our picks. We've "cracked the code" Nick. 

Before I sign off - a special thanks to Francis and Dan P. for staying in touch and keeping my spirits high, and of course to Janaid who submitted a Super Teaser article that I did not get to in time to share his brilliance with all of you. Hopefully, he'll have another recommendation for you next week. 

Good luck out there, and remember our new motto: If you're not winning, you're probably reading too much Spread Zone.

Vinny and Marco