NBA Playoff Pick-a-thon Day 55: Pete and Repeat Are in a Boat...

NBA POST-SEASON RECORD TO DATE: 51-30 ATS 

NBA FINALS: 3-1 ATS

KYLE'S NHL PICKS TO DATE: 51-39-1

KYLE'S MLB PICKS TO DATE: 166-136-7

KYLE'S UFC PICKS: 11-6 (8-0 on confidence picks)

KYLE'S TENNIS PICKS: 2-0

Yesterday I taught that old joke to my daughter: Pete and repeat are in a boat, Pete fell out who's left? Repeat. Pete and Repeat are in a boat, Pete fell out who's left? She answered right away, but it took a little while for her to get the concept, and being the empathic little three year-old that she is she asked, "Dad, why did Pete fall out of the boat." 
"He was probably drinking," I joked, and because she thought I meant he was leaning out of the boat to drink some of the water they were floating in she decided to repeat that answer later in the day when she tried the joke out on her mom. 
"Mom, Pete and Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out because he was drinking. Who's still in the boat?" 

Regardless of the translation, this year's NBA Finals has been reminiscent of this stupid, elementary school riddle with the Miami Heat and the San Antonio Spurs taking turns being Repeat and the coaches probably taking turns drinking. In hopes that my actions could some how mediate a different outcome, and perhaps make my blog post as intriguing as Johnny Depp's 1995 thriller "Nick of Time," I decided to try some real time blogging last night during Game 4. 

5:53 Just tuning in. Can somebody please tell me who the hell Jessie Williams is, what he's doing interrupting my NBA Finals pre-game? It seems like every time I turn the T.V. on, he's there showing me what he can do with his fancy new phone. By the way, dude, Steph Curry called - he wants his eyes back. 




5:57: Introductions for the Miami Heat sound like a doctor after unsuccessful surgery. "I'm afraid I've got some terrible, terrible news - starting at the other guard...Dwyane Wade. Yes, I know he spells it ridiculously. It's all very sad."  

5:58: Drums please. Kick it. Awwww yeah. Can you feel it baby? Wait, where's Marky Mark? Oh, it's just the San Antonio Spurs starting line-up. Disappointing. I was having a Funky Bunch flash back. My wife just asked me if this was a playoff game or something to which I replied, "No, just normal every day festivities in Texas." Your mission, should you choose to accept it: find a Google image of Marky Mark with more clothes on than this.




6:02 Jeff Van Gundy looks much better since he embraced his baldness. Either that or coaching was going to kill him within a decade if he'd stuck with it. If not the stress, then the tackling of ginormous athletes in an attempt to break up fights.

      

6:07 Tip-off. Turnover. Coach Pop looks frustrated already. Turnover back to the Spurs and Parker's hammy looks fine or medicated or both. 

6:15 Spurs up 15-5. Time out Miami. Eric Spoelstra's pep talk, "C'mon you guys," pausing to flip through his Pat Riley Quote book, "When a great team loses through complacency, it will constantly search for new and more intricate explanations to explain away defeat." Blank stares. "No, that was the one for the media," flip, flip, "Here we go: Look for your choices, pick the best one, then go with it. Yeah, that sounds about right. Make me look good, guys."



6:27 Mike Miller has to be tired. After spending the entire season on the bench he suddenly gets the starting nod in Game 4 of the NBA Finals? 




6:29 8-0 Miami run ties the game at 19 while I was searching for the above image. Six first quarter turnovers for the Spurs and this is starting to have a Game 2 feel early.

6:34 When Miami took their first lead a couple of minutes ago you could feel the intensity of this game crank up a notch on both ends of the floor. LeBron James and Tony Parker stepping into the limelight for their respective teams.



6:37 End of the first quarter. Miami leads 29-26. The Heat shoot 61% from the field, the Spurs have more than twice as many turnovers as Miami, and somehow it's still a three point game. The UNDER's not looking too good right now.

6:42 Poor Tiago Splitter. Blocked on a dunk by D. Wade. If Chris Bosh can get in on that action, Miami Heat marketing will be able to package a Big Three poster package. Who am I kidding? Bosh anywhere near the rim - that's pure fiction.



6:47 Wow. The Heat look impressive. 41-31 half way through the second quarter. Are we destined for  a series of blowouts? Wouldn't that set up perfectly for an all-time classic Game 7?

6:55 Offensive foul on Tim Duncan? That was such an obvious flop by Chris Bosh that I'm pretty sure I saw him making out a a check for $5,000 while still in the fetal position.


"Do you accept cashier's checks?"

7:01 Tony Parker is like the blind kid who suddenly has exceptional hearing. His limited hamstring appears to have heightened his ability to change directions in mid-air whilst setting up his teammates for easy lay-ups. Mini-run by the Spurs cuts the lead to five. Time out Pat Riley. I mean Spoelstra.



7:06 Anyone who says Ray Allen has slowed down is nuts. His shot is so fast it's as though someone is playing NBA2K with their finger constantly holding the X Button waiting for him to get the ball. Steph Curry may have taken his throne, but Ray Allen's still playing in June.



7:10 Boris Diaw sighting. Baseline three pointer and it's suddenly a four point game. That guy was awesome on the Phoenix Suns. Everyone looked awesome on that team in that system with that point guard. Maybe Nash did deserve those MVPs.



7:12 Tony Parker...I'm speechless. 12.3 seconds left in the half and we're all tied up. I'm taking the half off to grab some dinner and put my daughter to bed. When I'm watching sports, she likes to ask me which team I'm rooting for. When I tell her, she always lets me know that she's rooting for both of the teams. I appreciate the unscathed, non-competitive being she remains at three and a half years old. Even when her friends say things like, "I'm the winner" or "I beat you," she'll finish up the activity and say, "We're both the winner." She has a glowing future in politics...or gambling.

7:46 Okay, I'm back. My wife has been talking my ear off about nonsense for the first six minutes of this quarter. Nonetheless, it's a one point game with eighteen minutes left in the half. By the time I finished getting annoyed with her for teasing me about the word "nonetheless," HOWEVER, the Heat had gone on a 5-0 run. Stream of consciousness writing with an English teacher hovering over your shoulder is probably like Danny Green trying to post up LeBron James. Just get out of the way and let me do my thing already.



7:51 Time out Miami. Time out Vinny.

7:55 This is the team we've seen Miami can be in the third quarter of games. They remind me of the Jordan-led Bulls teams of the '90's and Shaq-Laker squads a few years later. Pacing, pacing, pacing, intensity, traps, press, stop, score, stop, turnover, dagger, and it's suddenly an eight point game 74-66 Miami.

8:01 A three by Gary Neal and the Spurs cut the lead to 86-83. Two questions, where did Neal come from and what's with all the guys in the NBA with two first names? Paul George, Cory Joseph, Tony Parker, and so on. Answers: Towson University and it doubles a player's chance of becoming the classic single name athletes such as Shaq, Kobe, and LeBron. This guy knows what I'm talking about.

8:04 End of the third quarter, Miami Heat lead 81-76. That OVER is looking really good right about now.

8:19 Wade just stole the ball, made three different moves in a one-man fast break and slammed the ball home. Twenty-six points in and it appears Dwyane Wade's bionic knee replacement surgery has taken. What and how much of it do you think they're injecting him with before each game?

8:21 Every time I think we're about to see a good game, Miami puts a mini-run together and stretches the lead back out. They're like the big brother holding the little brother's head at arm's length to prevent his flailing arms from making contact. Six minutes left in the game - Heat by 11.

8:28 Five minutes to go and the lead has ballooned to fifteen. Now I’m bored. These two teams look to be on pace to break the Average Margin of Victory in an evenly matched NBA Finals. Game in San Antonio of Sunday promises to be a San Antonio Spurs rout. Actually, I think we might finally get a close game when the series suddenly shrinks to a three game set with no margin for error.

8:31 Marco called, interrupting my writing, and making me wish he’d been on speaker phone the whole game. Since he's leaving for Tennessee on Sunday we talked through our predictions for the rest of the series – Spurs, Heat, Spurs – ATS that is. The champion is TBD. 

“Game 7 is going to be intense,” I said.

“Like camping,” Marco replied, which gave me the perfect conclusion to this post.

See you back here for Game 5 on Sunday.

Vinny and Marco

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